The good stuff

I can tell you now, that a few months ago I hit rock bottom. I was having an anxiety attack a day, bawling uncontrollably....just miserable.

You know that commercial, where does depression hurt? EVERY WHERE Its awful. I suddenly got overwhelmed by the "deployment" having 3 kids, a house, being a pseudo single parent. I was miserable! I am a sunshine and roses kind of person, I like to laugh, be goofy and just LIVE, so depression didn't work well in my life and after a gut wrenching life altering anxiety attack I knew I had to do something.

I started going to Zumba, twice a week I made it my #1 priority. It gave me two child free hours a week (god bless you YMCA daycare) and it was FUN! I was never into dancing and I didn't think Zumba and I would get along, but she saved my life.

I also watched the movie Ghandi, and started praying. I found praying brought me peace even if I didn't really have anything to tell God I felt like he was listening and just telling me to RELAX.

Also after the anxiety attacks became a daily ritual, I went to the doctor. I begged her to help me, because aside from all the relaxation and fun I was learning they just wouldnt take a hike. I was a hot mess! I will tell you now, I am not one for medication, but I tried everything in my power to feel better and it just wasn't happening. Then like magic with the help of what i call a happy pill, I was all better!

I didn't think I should post this to the world, but perhaps you are reading this and suffering. Don't suffer anymore, did you know the sky is blue? The grass is so green and life is absolutely breath taking. There is so much out there for us to accomplish and we only get one chance at this life. Grab a hold of your day and make it what you want it to be. Kick that depression monkey off your back and tell him to go back to the jungle!

Try a dance class, hike a mountain, take photos, sing at the top of your lungs, run around in circles, do SOMETHING, anything! Re claim the kid who used to get in trouble in school for giggling, the one who would laugh so hard you thought your face would burst. You owe it to yourself and your family.

I am being the change I want to see, and loving every day from here on out.

Yesterday, my husband said to me after I told him I want to be a zumba instructor "dont you think you have enough going on?" Yes, I probably do! college classes, three kids, a Husband in another country,  zumba, I just launched my photography business and yes now I want to get certified in Zumba.

I feel good, great even and I want it all and I am going to take it.  Watch out world.